Will Slim Shady’s (Owner) Please Not Stand Up

I’ve been seeing a lot of nearly-nudes in London’s parks. I found one such tan-maxer in Hyde Park, quite a corpulent fleshly lady, lying spread eagled on the grass wearing nothing but body oil and Brazilian knickers. Her companion was Slim, a neckerchief wearing Chihuahua. I know this to be his name, because she hollered at, back, and after him as he ran around the park barking and stealing sandwiches and sausages out of picnickers hands. But the real jeopardy was not in this terrorist of a dog. It was in the common held concern that his owner might stand up.